Freudian Slips: Handyman on a Swivel

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Location: Irony, New Jersey, United States

Life takes us many places. It's a box of chocolates and a Hansel and Gretal trail of candy wrappers. I have filmed as an actor in The Happening, Invincible, The Lovely Bones, The Bounty Hunter, The Greek American, Bazookas, Limitless, TV's Its Always Sunny in Philly, Outlaw, New York, The Warrior, The Nail, Game Change, Cold Case, & commercial work includes The Philadelphia Eagles, Septa, Coors, Turbo Tax & Carnival Cruises. Freudian Slips spotlights irony in short story format.

December 14, 2006

Handyman on a Swivel

By taking extraordinary measures with little aptitude and even fewer tools, I keep my house in working order. With that being said, it is trying times when your front door, bathroom toilet, and refrigerator break on the same day. That is exactly what happened to me. Talk about being in a jamb, off and running, and coming in from out in the cold.
Of course, I didn’t have the right Phillips screwdriver for the front door, my biggest pipe wrench proved too short for the toilet throat, and my best fixit job on the sophisticated refrigerator involved pulling it out from the wall and cleaning behind the box. One stubborn strain about me is that I do not like to ask for help but after resigning myself to calling in reinforcements, OCD and me started to breathe a little easier. With the help of my handy father-in-law and the right fitting tools, we got the villa back on line again one project at a time.
Now it’s off to the showers…assuming it works.



Anonymous Anonymous said...

Isn't it fun! Had someone come to clean the gutters and I suppose he didn't know that I can see them still filled with leaves from the second floor! Humm...hard to get good help. What was he thinking?

8:13 AM  
Blogger Joe Tornatore said...

He put the LEAVE in leave.

8:25 AM  
Blogger PaxRomano said...

Be careful when pulling those false move and you'll have an asymmetrical abdomen!

2:08 PM  
Blogger Joe Tornatore said...

A man's protrusion should never be that high. lol

3:51 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

You sound just like my husband! Do you leave one little part of the job unfinished too?

We just move from Southern NJ to Atlanta, but what I keep telling my husband is, I wonder what will happen when the new owners of our NJ home discover the entire left outer trim on the house is blue, while the rest is white and has been for 7 years.

Thanks for letting me share!

8:25 AM  
Blogger Joe Tornatore said...

Two-tones is in. By the way, our neighbors just moved from Atlanta back here.

4:56 PM  

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