Freudian Slips: Cheeseburger in Paradox

Freudian SlipsImage Hosted by


My Photo
Location: Irony, New Jersey, United States

Life takes us many places. It's a box of chocolates and a Hansel and Gretal trail of candy wrappers. I have filmed as an actor in The Happening, Invincible, The Lovely Bones, The Bounty Hunter, The Greek American, Bazookas, Limitless, TV's Its Always Sunny in Philly, Outlaw, New York, The Warrior, The Nail, Game Change, Cold Case, & commercial work includes The Philadelphia Eagles, Septa, Coors, Turbo Tax & Carnival Cruises. Freudian Slips spotlights irony in short story format.

May 26, 2010

Cheeseburger in Paradox

One of my developmentally disabled clients stopped by my satellite office for an unscheduled greeting. He muttered frustration under his breath. "Joe, I need to talk to you. My girlfriend is receiving too much services. You know, the same services as me only way more and different."
I smirked, "Don't say support services like it's a bad thing."
"Joe, it's good and bad. Since my gastro bypass surgery, I lost 170 pounds, you know.”
“You lost a whole person. You look fantastic.”
“Thanks. I must finally look trim enough because I attracted a girlfriend. She asked me out. I'm trying to gain a sweetheart after losing a person, you might say." He smiles cheesily. "For our first date, we go to Ruby Tuesday's for a cheeseburger. She has her agency chauffer pick me up at my townhouse. What's that all about? While I tolerated the free ride to the restaurant, she says that this cool program she is in, Real Wife Choices, comes with a driver.”
“That’s not the name of her program but the devil is in the details. Go on.”
“Anyway, we get to Ruby Tuesday’s and her chauffer doesn’t wait in the car. The driver brags about being hungry. The chauffer comes in and sits down at the table with us. It's my frigging first date and she is reading the menu to me. It's bad enough I got to pay for my date when Joe, well you didn't even get my voucher approved. No way was I paying for the lunch of a chauffer. Bottom line. Your workers got to stop coming on dates with me. Joe, you got to do something about this program of hers. I’m telling you she's spoiled rotten and I don't need a chaperone."



Anonymous Anonymous said...

Cute story, ain't love grand!!

8:18 AM  
Blogger mommanator said...

tcute, but for crying out loud how true!

10:50 AM  

Post a Comment

<< Home

Free Image Hosting at