Freudian Slips: Random Observations of a Shopper

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Location: Irony, New Jersey, United States

Life takes us many places. It's a box of chocolates and a Hansel and Gretal trail of candy wrappers. I have filmed as an actor in The Happening, Invincible, The Lovely Bones, The Bounty Hunter, The Greek American, Bazookas, Limitless, TV's Its Always Sunny in Philly, Outlaw, New York, The Warrior, The Nail, Game Change, Cold Case, & commercial work includes The Philadelphia Eagles, Septa, Coors, Turbo Tax & Carnival Cruises. Freudian Slips spotlights irony in short story format.

April 22, 2008

Random Observations of a Shopper

  • I saw a uniformed supermarket checkout girl buying groceries in the Self Checkout line. Talk about death by proxy.
  • I can't hold a candle to the fact that ice cream cakes are not made from one poof of flour.
  • A grave blanket on clearance sale at a pet store. What is next, sun block for melting ice cubes?
  • I can never find cone coffee filters in packets greater than 100 but basket shaped filters sell in bulk packs of 500. Somebody needs to break the mold at Papperidge Farm.
  • When I think back on it, grapefruits are now the size of the oranges of my childhood. Too bad that I can barely afford any fruit, regardless of size, in my adulthood.
  • There is something wrong with the world today when a crate of bottled water crafted into eco-friendly containers is for sale next to a free public water fountain.
  • Paying .75 cents a minute to call a lottery hotline to find out that you are an even bigger loser.

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3 Comments:

Blogger mommanator said...

well -buy one of those many use filters for your pot-they are about $5.00 @ Walmart, all you do is rinse em out and reuse. I stopped looking for replacement filters ages ago, and yes they come in cone size(cant help it-for your head)
And to the next money safer- I know you have a computer, check your lottery tickets online. Why in the world would you give .75cents to the phone company to find that you are a big loser. Just bookmark the lottery site and you can check adinfanitum(SP?)

10:35 AM  
Blogger Joe Tornatore said...

mommanator,
coffee doesn't taste the same in those contraptions for me.

6:03 PM  
Anonymous et said...

Yes, Joe, I agree....nothing is as it seems....as a society, we have lost ???? along the way!

Look at the recent news event with the polygamists and their many children.....the offspring call all the men "uncle!"

New name for father: combination of Dad & Uncle = "Duncle."

I wonder if the kids will go around wearing pastel colored T-shirts asking, "Are you my Duncle?" or "Are you my baby's Duncle?"

9:18 AM  

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