A Courtroom Drama

As I stood before the chatty Kathy of a female Judge as a prospective Superior Court juror for a criminal case, I needed to remind myself that I was not the one on trial.

The judge asked me “Are there any questions in the ava doire document that might excuse you from this trial before the court?”

I explained, “I only answered affirmative to one question but I do not want to be dismissed because of it.”

“What question triggered a yes response, juror?”

“Number 13. With my job as a social worker, I have on occasion testified in court in regards to my clients, who are developmentally disabled.”

“I do not see how that could interfere in this particular case.” She ruled. “Juror number 183, about a hundred jurors have come and gone before you. You know the drill. Tell us a little about yourself turning now to the selected questions of a personal nature.”

“Like I said, I am a social worker. This is my 22nd year. I am married for a second time but who is counting? I have four children –two biological and two stepchildren. Three daughters and a son. You wanted to know their respective ages – 12, 12, 15 and almost 17. Only the oldest works and the rest are still objecting to chores. Oh, I forgot to mention that I work as an actor too. And you wanted to know my favorite television shows. I enjoy sporting events and my favorite TV show is The Sopranos.

The judge smiled widely. “Juror number 183, could you approach the bench?”

On my way to the judge’s bench, I wondered what I said that needed sidebar conversation in private. I gave a tough swallow then adopted a whispering voice.

The judge shouted behind me. “Council, can you join us at the bench?”

The footsteps from polished shoes approached behind me. The prosecutor and the defense attorney quickly flanked either side of me. We stood poised like three solid masses before her excellence. The rest of the crowded courtroom had no other choice but to wait without being able to listen.

The eager judge pushed on the frame of her glasses and leaned forward. “Council, you will have to excuse me and pardon this interruption. I have to seize the moment. This is the first actor I have run into since The Sopranos ended. Tell me, juror, and give me your honest opinion, what did you think of the Sopranos finale?”