Freudian Slips: Lie to You

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Location: Irony, New Jersey, United States

Life takes us many places. It's a box of chocolates and a Hansel and Gretal trail of candy wrappers. I have filmed as an actor in The Happening, Invincible, The Lovely Bones, The Bounty Hunter, The Greek American, Bazookas, Limitless, TV's Its Always Sunny in Philly, Outlaw, New York, The Warrior, The Nail, Game Change, Cold Case, & commercial work includes The Philadelphia Eagles, Septa, Coors, Turbo Tax & Carnival Cruises. Freudian Slips spotlights irony in short story format.

June 12, 2007

Lie to You

Pick out the isolated lie among the truth.

A bow can be taken for the lie found.

1) When I earned my masters degree, I worked full time as a custodian.
2) I once was on a Tv show that aired against SpongeBob SquarePants.
3) I was engaged to a print media model who later appeared nude in a porn magazine.
4) I have witnessed UFO’s.
5) As a teenager, I could drink a half gallon of beer in ten seconds.
6) I can eat a whole pizza pie in one sitting.
7) I once watched Star Wars The Empire Strikes Back six times without interruption.
8) In a court of law, I am undefeated as my own pro se attorney.
9) I have seen ghosts.
10)I once held two full time jobs and the hours coincided.
11)I played in a ping-pong tournament with my opposite hand.
12)A US patent is in my name.
13)I went out on a first date on Friday the 13th and saw the movie Friday the 13th.
14)My BA degree parchment reads from a school that wasn’t in existence the year I graduated.
15)I was featured as a newspaper comic strip.

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12 Comments:

Blogger Pax Romano said...

I am going to pick number three.

What do I win?

10:21 PM  
Blogger Joe Tornatore said...

Pax,
your guess has been officially recorded.

11:09 PM  
Blogger mommanator said...

Hey I was gonna pick that one, they all sound like you! But give me the one about holding 2 jobs

9:01 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I'm with Pax; give me number 3.

1:00 PM  
Blogger Joe Tornatore said...

mommanator,
duly noted.

anonymous,
doesn't anyone think I have the goods to date a model?

7:10 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

#10 is definitily the truth since i had to cover for you at your full time job while you slithered off to your part time job. My reward for years of lying to my boss and covering your caseload.... an electronic rolodex for Christmas

7:32 PM  
Blogger Joe Tornatore said...

anonymous,
Without the jaded tone in your voice, I would never have guessed who this is?

12:46 AM  
Blogger honkeie2 said...

I would say 3 ass well. But I have seen many porn mags and I think I might have seen you in one.

11:52 AM  
Blogger Joe Tornatore said...

honk,
She appeared nude. I appeared embarrassed for her. lol

7:08 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Three as well. Knowing you, a plaque (magazine cover, personalized photo) would be hanging on the basement walls. Now that would be too much to BARE!

9:20 PM  
Blogger Joe Tornatore said...

anonymous,
Sounds like you have been over my house one too many times. lol

9:51 PM  
Blogger Joe Tornatore said...

everyone,
The answer is #3. You voyeuristic readers just know too much about me.

9:48 PM  

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