Freudian Slips: When It Rains It Pours

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Location: Irony, New Jersey, United States

Life takes us many places. It's a box of chocolates and a Hansel and Gretal trail of candy wrappers. I have filmed as an actor in The Happening, Invincible, The Lovely Bones, The Bounty Hunter, The Greek American, Bazookas, Limitless, TV's Its Always Sunny in Philly, Outlaw, New York, The Warrior, The Nail, Game Change, Cold Case, & commercial work includes The Philadelphia Eagles, Septa, Coors, Turbo Tax & Carnival Cruises. Freudian Slips spotlights irony in short story format.

March 28, 2006

When It Rains It Pours

In the 1980’s, I worked at an institution that housed behaviorally involved individuals behind locked doors. My commute from home was far. By far and away, the work responsibilities were the most physically and mentally taxing that I have had in my life.
While walking on the campus en route to the Personnel Department, anxiety wrangled my inner sanctum. A whirling dervish of negativity, I rehashed the several things going wrong for me at once. I just returning from a work-related injury, elements of my personal life were in disarray, and nobody seemed home whenever I did soul searching. When it rains it pours. The world seemed to be passing me by. So I stopped dead in my tracks to say a short prayer. My head bowed in reverence. I bypassed asking God for inner strength. Rather, I selfishly asked for a sabbatical from grief. Before I could get out an Amen for a closing statement, a bird flying overhead literally crapped all over me. I must have stopped on the bulls eye target. I ended my prayer by resurrecting the name of Jesus Christ.
When birds of an omen flock together, you are better off moving along and counting your blessings.

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8 Comments:

Blogger PaxRomano said...

and who says god does not have a sense of humor?

9:31 PM  
Anonymous marcus said...

Then I come over for a pool game and you just want to crap all over me. It's trickle down economics I am sure.

9:42 PM  
Blogger Joe Tornatore said...

Pax,
Not me.

Marcus,
Those are the breaks! lol.

11:01 PM  
Anonymous et said...

Can you see how lucky you truly were, Joe? Instead of having your head bowed in prayer, you could have been looking up! Eating crap is much worse than mopping it up!

11:58 AM  
Blogger Joe Tornatore said...

Et,
The real luck came in that birds were not migrating on that day. I only had one lone assassin.

6:02 PM  
Blogger Maja said...

I've heard that it's actually good luck to have a bird poop on you. Seriously!

12:33 AM  
Blogger Joe Tornatore said...

Maja,
You could have fooled me! lol

12:08 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I think the birds really do read a how to poop book by the looks of my car and at times me. Emily

4:03 PM  

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