Freudian Slips: Ready, Set, Grow Project

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Location: Irony, New Jersey, United States

Life takes us many places. It's a box of chocolates and a Hansel and Gretal trail of candy wrappers. I have filmed as an actor in The Happening, Invincible, The Lovely Bones, The Bounty Hunter, The Greek American, Bazookas, Limitless, TV's Its Always Sunny in Philly, Outlaw, New York, The Warrior, The Nail, Game Change, Cold Case, & commercial work includes The Philadelphia Eagles, Septa, Coors, Turbo Tax & Carnival Cruises. Freudian Slips spotlights irony in short story format.

January 17, 2006

Ready, Set, Grow Project

-my firstborn watching picture-in-a-picture video of herself

Ready, Set, Grow Project By Joe Tornatore

Thanks to modern technology expectant parents can see vivid imagery of fetal development inside the mother’s womb. If nothing else, the imagery shows how quickly human beings develop. Once a baby is born, the window of opportunity to capture those moments on film is smaller than most parents might imagine. Like many fledgling parents, I purchased my first camcorder when my firstborn arrived on the scene. Wanting to capture every magic moment, I began to make countless video diaries. With my creative juices flowing as a wily cameraman, I stumbled upon an interesting alternative to ordinary videotaping. I would like to share how to make a video growth chart of your child.

Ultrasound images of the fetus make a wonderful state-of-the-art starting point. Otherwise, take a minute long tape of your newborn. Concentrate your video efforts on close-up full-bodied images. Minimize background noise when filming so that the only audio comes from your baby. Set the video aside. Mark your calendar at six month intervals so you know when it is time to film another segment. Time flies when you are slinging diapers.

At the six-month marker, place your infant in front of a television set that has playback capability. Play the taped footage of your newborn on the television set. Film another short clip of your infant in front of the television. For optimal results, utilize a tripod to video record from the same angle. Set the updated video aside.

After another six months, play back the infant tape while taking additional live footage of your toddler. In time, use the toddler tape as playback before taking more live footage. Interrupt your parenting every six months to repeat the process. Always use the most recent footage for your playback image on the television set. You get the picture.

A chronological picture-in-a-picture growth history of your child will emerge in a matrix. Your heart will burst watching your child develop from emitting coos to babble to emerging speech, from laying to crawling to standing all in a single frame of reference. Ready, set, grow!



Blogger eatmisery said...

Thanks for the idea, Joe! I, too, purchased a camcorder (mine's a dvd recorder) right before my firstborn arrived.

Thanks for sharing!

11:20 AM  
Blogger Maja said...

That's so clever!

3:35 AM  
Blogger PaxRomano said...

Actually it's a very artsy idea! I like it! Would that I had any children, I might try it

9:02 AM  
Blogger Maidink said...

Oooo, I like that idea! Of course, I'm about three years too late for the Dinks, but Geo and I will see if we can remedy that hiccough.

1:16 PM  

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