Our three-tier backyard deck has now taken me half of a summer to complete in drips and drabs. Mistakes, repairs, powerwashing, painting the uprights, and staining the deck boards has killed half of a summer. Faulty plumbing fixtures, a broken big screen TV, and a leaky roof have derailed the completion of the deck and caused empty white rabbit pockets and headache.
Last week, while plugging along on the final coat of stain on the top deck, I heard an unmistakable sound with only a few boards to go. The savage sound frightened me but not for the reason you might think.
A deadwood tree severed from its root moorings and began what seemed like a slow motion fall through the canopy of the woods. As I turned to see what direction the tree fell, my personal safety seemed an after thought. I concentrated on all of the toil I had poured into this deck that I didn’t want go to waste.
I shouted to the tree Gods. “Not the deck! Don’t hit the deck! Not the deck!”
The tree caused a sensational whooshing noise against the ground but missed the deck by the safety net of fifty yards. My next-door neighbor ran out of her house in hysterics but I went right back to staining better wood than what fell. I want this deck done before it is time to store the deck furniture for the season. After all, I can just about see the forest through the trees now.
Labels: short story
13 Comments:
You have trees in New Jersey?
It sounds like a lot of dead wood, including your deck, to me!!!!
wouldn't you know it, you can hear one tree falling!
Remember, with proper consultation hours of toil wood have been avoided. Confuscous say, "Splintered plan leave no time for summer".
Tennis Anyone!
annonymous #3 how right you are
To the bunch of wisecracking punster imposters, I will not respond to you. I am instead opting to enjoy a cold iced tea on my deck.
Do you have your hard hat on??
Bilybob,
Nothing but a hard head here.
Anonymous #3 again,
I like how your chosen beverage of ice tea compliments the current color of your deck. Three weeks ago it would have been EGGNOG.
anonymous,
You are making a STAIN of yourself. Stop now before I make it a point to melee you down a dark corridor in Call of Duty.
Ah, the joys of homeownership.....
Zelda,
All this without ferns.
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by New Jordans
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