Every Breath I Take

After a gym workout, I occasionally cool down in the swimming pool. I prefer to take advantage of this opportunity when there is nobody else using the pool. There is nothing more serene than lying submerged in still water by my lonesome. Many people do not like being alone in their skin. For better or worse, I have never been quite like other people.

Left alone in this world to my own devices, I will lay with my eyes closed floating on my back in water. I embrace the weightless buoyancy by paddling just enough to avoid sinking. The void of outside noises, voices, and distractions is soothing. With no waves or ripples and just my nose teetering above tepid water, my worries dissipate. I do not know if it is a logical extension of myself or a spiritual experience but something happens when I skim across the top of a swimming pool. If I listen closely, I can hear myself breathe. Most people take their breath for granted but noticing the very breath giving life is exactly the exclamation point. I draw deep breaths through my lungs and push air out through my mouth. It magnifies the sound of my breath in an echo chamber. A purposeful oxymoron, my breath makes me feel alive like no other feeling on this planet. Whenever I recreate this wonderful feeling, it is as if I am in a warm womb preparing for birth. Without fail, I ask God what I should be doing with my precious breaths in my life, however many may be left. To what end I do not know but the answer inadvertently always comes back to writing. To keep writing.