Freudian Slips: Flexible Flyer

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Location: Irony, New Jersey, United States

Life takes us many places. It's a box of chocolates and a Hansel and Gretal trail of candy wrappers. I have filmed as an actor in The Happening, Invincible, The Lovely Bones, The Bounty Hunter, The Greek American, Bazookas, Limitless, TV's Its Always Sunny in Philly, Outlaw, New York, The Warrior, The Nail, Game Change, Cold Case, & commercial work includes The Philadelphia Eagles, Septa, Coors, Turbo Tax & Carnival Cruises. Freudian Slips spotlights irony in short story format.

February 14, 2006

Flexible Flyer

-Joe Tornatore, not showing his age.

Not to be confused with a medal event at this years Winter Olympics, I took my son, nieces, and a few of their friends sledding today. The real estate of Blackwood, New Jersey's Valleybrook golf course offers sledding par excellence. This golf course is a popular playground after a snow storm. The undulating course has something for everybody with beginner, intermediate, and challenger hills.

Most of the parents took to the sidelines. I hung out with the kids on a 200 yard long fast track. The snow was packed real tight and the sleds glided effortlessly. The shallow creek at the bottom of the hill put an unwelcome chill on a few youngsters. I really felt my girth when I belly-flopped onto the sled. I did a total of nine runs then it was all downhill for me. Like a flexible flyer no more, fatigue set in. I could have used a ski lift to the top of the hill and a cup of hot chocolate. Instead, I stayed at the bottom of the hill and turned the event into a spectator sport. Henceforth, I observed the fun of others and took wonderful action packed photos to (winter)boot.

If not for the extra pounds weighing in on middle age, the day evoked childhood memories of sledding. As a child, I used to sled on a gold course too during a time when Flexible Flyer sleds dominated the landscape. Nowadays, it has been taken over by plastic saucers, foam sleds, and snowboards.

Present company not included, I only saw one Flexible Flyer all day. I caught the bright red handle bars coming down the course right away. The girl couldn't have been more than twelve years old. Seated firmly on the antique sled, her feet steered the sled down the snow covered course. She had no other choice. She was talking on her cell phone. Now that sleighed me.



Blogger Erin said...

In my opinion, you haven't truly been sleding until you feel the snow under the blades and you get a few spinters in your bum. Of course, cell phone is optional. However, I have heard that cell phone use while sleding is illegal in several states.

1:20 AM  
Blogger Shannon said...

I agree with Erin... but it still looks like you had fun regardless. Enjoy the snow while it is still snow and not dirty slush!! lol

Happy Valentines Day!

9:19 AM  
Blogger rfvgardens said...

Thanks for helping me to remember the only thing snow is good for.

5:56 PM  
Blogger Joe Tornatore said...

yeah, you would have to sled a ong time on hard plastic before snaring a splinter.

It's the snow shoveling that tips the iceberg.

Sledding is more exercise than Stratomatic baseball.

7:40 PM  
Anonymous Antarro said...

I enjoyed your recount of those snowy yesterdays. I thought I would let you know; I have my Flexible Flyer safely placed in a spare room. Of course it has been polished and is now a treasured reminder of wonderful times I spent with my brothers sledding and getting pounded by snowballs. A few years ago,my girlfriend at the time,accidentally included it in the inventory of a yard sale we were having. I quickly grabbed it and told her it was priceless. Furthermore, I would sooner place a clearance tag on her than part with this magical boyhood classic. Someone offered me six hundred American dollars for it, but I turned them away. I did, however, let the girl go for fifty.

11:28 PM  
Blogger Joe Tornatore said...

sell high, buy low.

12:35 AM  
Anonymous Antarro said...


That's pretty funny. You really sleigh me....

1:54 PM  

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