Freudian Slips: A Tail Piping of Caution

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Location: Irony, New Jersey, United States

Life takes us many places. It's a box of chocolates and a Hansel and Gretal trail of candy wrappers. I have filmed as an actor in The Happening, Invincible, The Lovely Bones, The Bounty Hunter, The Greek American, Bazookas, Limitless, TV's Its Always Sunny in Philly, Outlaw, New York, The Warrior, The Nail, Game Change, Cold Case, & commercial work includes The Philadelphia Eagles, Septa, Coors, Turbo Tax & Carnival Cruises. Freudian Slips spotlights irony in short story format.

September 15, 2005

A Tail Piping of Caution

On the same day that my oldest daughter attended her first driver’s education class in high school, comes the following story of ironic mishap.
A gas station attendant approached my car with a surly demeanor. “Sorry it took so long , guy, we have a situation. How much can I get you?”
“Ten dollars regular, please.” I could hear commotion by a bunch of tangled cars. “What is going on?” I asked.
“You're not going to believe it. See that teenager with the mullet? He pulled up into the gas station and asked for $20.00 gas. I gave him the gas. No problem. Then the smack discovers he left his money home. He shows me an empty wallet. I believe his story but I tell him that he has to surrender his driver’s license as collateral or I’m calling the coppers. He just got his driver’s license yesterday so he pitches a royal fit. He wings the license at me and peels out in a huff. Before he is even out of the parking lot, he slams into a van totaling his own car, which he said he just bought. The van driver just asked him to produce his license but of course I have it.” The attendant grinned menacingly. “Ya know, looks like the coppers are going to have to be called anyway. Now mullet head is out a car, a license, he needs a ride home, and he still freaking owes me $20.00 for gas he probably will never get to use.”
A simple request, all I wanted was gasoline at $3.06 cents a gallon. The attendant sure put the fill in filling station. We are all paying at the pumps. Some more than others.

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10 Comments:

Blogger Merci said...

Stranger than fiction. Kids with cars... Scary!

10:01 PM  
Anonymous et said...

I have sympathy for the poor lad! What a way to start a driving record! Anger management is surely needed for this young man. Hopefully, he will see that anger begets nothing but misery.

10:39 AM  
Blogger lilly05 said...

OUCH, I don't think I need to be hearing this Joe. I've got my first slated for lisensure in a mere two years!!

12:46 PM  
Blogger PaxRomano said...

Mullets cause accidents - it's a fact!

10:40 AM  
Blogger eatmisery said...

Pax is right. Mullets cause accidents. That must've hurt in more ways than one.

11:46 AM  
Blogger Joe Tornatore said...

pax, eatmisery,
a hair raising experience for the driver no less!

5:33 PM  
Blogger Maidink said...

Funny story for us but sad for the young driver.

Mullets and bad tempers. Sounds like a day in NE Philly.

10:02 AM  
Blogger Joe Tornatore said...

maiddink,
i saw jersey tags but i hear you. drivers of philly not any better. thanks for visiting.

7:27 PM  
Blogger Christa said...

funny how the irony I get from this post is that you actually get full service for 3.06 a gallon. Holy crap. We don't even have a full service station around here anymore. And the insurance agent in me winced. Someday I'll have to blog the best of my clients' 'Dummy Damage'.

11:25 PM  
Blogger Joe Tornatore said...

christa,
NJ doesn't feel its residents are competent to pump their own gas. it is illegal to do so. few of us consider it a pampered state though with the highest car insurance premiums in the country.

10:25 AM  

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