Stop and Smell the Silk Roses

Extra, extra, read, all about it! UPS delivered four cartons of the second edition of my autobiography, Stop and Smell the Silk Roses this week. Any reader can tell from the hundreds of puns that I wrote this book cover to cover. The book is about deadly insect encounters, their interaction with my rare skin disease, and my unorthodox protection in a beekeeper's suit (see profile picture) until doctors figured out what in creation to do with me. The book description sounds like heavy reading but it is largely off-beat humor juxtaposed with near-death. There is something ironic about a man who sets out to write the story of his life and it winds up an unexpected comedy. I still don't know what to make of that one.

Life inside the suit produced comedic interactions from an infinity of strangers who confused me with every occupation under the sun. Looking back on my life it doesn't seem possible to have been confused with a dogcatcher, carnival worker, anthrax investigator, terrorist, fireman, bubble boy, exterminator, a chef, penguin feeder, part of a Candid Camera joke, Department of Health worker, World Trade Center cleanup worker, gardener, mascot for Canadian Maple Syrup, Haz-Mat worker, Ralph Nader activist, astronaut, butcher, and Mosquito Control Commission worker to name a few. I was once mistaken for a World Trade Center cleanup worker the same day I was frisked by police who suspected me of being a terrorist! I couldn't have been both and yet I was neither.

It is the story of an ordinary man, whose medical condition forced him into a life of extremes. It chronicles a man who got stung by a bee and wound up in a museum, in a comic strip, and on TV. It's one man's journey of self-discovery through mistaken identity. It is about a life given welcome pause and an opportunity to awaken to stop and smell the roses.

I need to reclaim my garage so if anyone wants a book chock full of irony and humor, send me an email at joetornatore@comcast.net . $11.99 gets you an autographed copy mailed to you. My friend Joe Heller said it best, "You can search The Library of Congress and not find a book like this." You got to love paid constituents!