Freudian Slips: Premonition of a Museum

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Location: Irony, New Jersey, United States

Life takes us many places. It's a box of chocolates and a Hansel and Gretal trail of candy wrappers. I have filmed as an actor in The Happening, Invincible, The Lovely Bones, The Bounty Hunter, The Greek American, Bazookas, Limitless, TV's Its Always Sunny in Philly, Outlaw, New York, The Warrior, The Nail, Game Change, Cold Case, & commercial work includes The Philadelphia Eagles, Septa, Coors, Turbo Tax & Carnival Cruises. Freudian Slips spotlights irony in short story format.

November 22, 2004

Premonition of a Museum

The curiosity of a boy often leads to either digging to China, digging for dinosaur bones, or the two expeditions colliding in one earth-moving activity with their father’s shovel. Many of my childhood memories are from Turnersville, New Jersey. Our family owned a bi-level house with a decent sized backyard. The lay of the land does not matter in a dig. The property ends where you see fit.
As a nine year old boy, my friends and I unearthed some rather large and unusually shaped bones a few feet below the surface. We dug them up and dusted the bones off. Through the backyard I sped, shouting “Dinosaur”. I barnstormed the house and my youthful exuberance grabbed my mother’s attention. Neither of my parents dared to call the Smithsonian Institute about our excavation because the bones were identified as cow bones. My disappointment showed. I dreamed of the bones to be destined for a museum and named “Joetornasaurus Rex.” in my honor.
That experience of finding something unusual for display in a museum never waned. Why I believed I would one day find something that would end up showcased in a museum seemed absurd, especially since my career choices mirrored psychology and sociology not paleontology or archeology. I can only reiterate that this premonition lingered from the age of discovery as a child into adulthood. I did not know why until November 21, 2004.
As it turns out, the fallout of personal tragedy enabled me to find myself not an artifact. Bee stings brought me to death’s door. Near death is often a precursor to an extemporaneous turnaround in life given a second chance. It took finding myself through a process of mistaken identity and that the clothes off of my back literally entered a museum floor. Ladies and gentlemen, I give you something equally as frightening as Joetornasaurus Rex. Introducing the newest exhibit to the Ripley’s Believe It or Not museum in Atlantic City, New Jersey – The Bee Man from Blackwood.
Life takes you many places, some you imagine, some you don’t even dream about. While I always envisioned a museum as a reality, the Ripley’s Believe It or Not museum wasn’t on my top ten list. Closure, however, has been supplied to that childhood memory with a vigorous exclamation point!
Always trust your instincts. Introspection can uncover much about life. The rest of life’s mysteries, you got to dig for.

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